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Should you trust women?

Does your smell attract women, or not?
>> The Smell That Attracts Women



Hey Guys—



Every now and then I’ll get a message from a guy telling me that

while he likes women, he doesn’t trust them and, in fact, finds
them to be scheming creatures.


I have always thought the word “trust” is a word like “equality,”

a word that bypasses critical thinking because it has a strong
emotional component.  People hear the words and love the abstraction
of them, but pay little attention to the actual reality.


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If you watch American Greed, you will see victims of scams say over

and over, “I felt I could trust him.”  If you read online dating
profiles, especially the female ones, you will see the phrase
“looking for a man I can trust.”


But when you ask people what “trust” actually means, they are at

first confused that you would ask them such a thing, then they are
bemused by the fact that they have a hard time understanding it.  
Often, when you ask that question, it’s the first time they’ve ever
thought critically about what “trust” actually is.


I have never liked the abstraction of “trust,” nor really even ever

the word because both of them contain a personal emotional component,
implying that not only will people behave in a predictable manner,
they will do so in a way that benefits YOU personally.  Moreover,
it implies they will suppress acting in their own self interest to
act in yours, something which is demonstrably untrue.


When there is a “breach” of trust, people get extremely angry and

embarrassed because their emotional investment and belief is suddenly
violated. But when you look at what their view of “trust” entailed
on the part of the other person, it is patently ridiculous from the
beginning.


I have found the concept of “predictability” much more useful than

the concept of “trust” because there is no emotional component to
predictability.  Probability also goes hand in hand with predictability
because you can assign loose odds to the behaviors you think a
particular person will engage in.


For example, in business, I negotiate with publishers, affiliates,

vendors, etc. for the performance of certain services, ad rates,
placements, etc.  When I make a deal, I assign a certain weight to
them doing what they promised, but also make allowances for the fact
that they may be lying, they may be incompetent, they may be plotting
to steal my money and deliver nothing, etc.  This is not “negative
thinking,” merely an acknowledgment based on observation and
experience that these things happen all the time in business and
that just because I am cool, that doesn’t mean they don’t apply to
me.


Furthermore, I at least think out what I will do when someone

engages in lower odds behavior that is detrimental to me, and when
they do so, I have a course of action.  More importantly, I don’t
have much of an emotional reaction because they behaved in a way I
found predictable.


When it comes to women the same thing applies. Women act in their

own self interests based on their point of view at the moment.  
You must acknowledge that sometimes those interests will coincide
with yours, while also acknowledging there are probabilities she
will also behave in ways that are not in line with your interests—
i.e. she may break a date with you to hang out with a sleazy ex
boyfriend who makes her feel chemistry.


My advice is to replace “trust” with “predictability.”  That way

you are emotionally and pragmatically prepared when someone does
something contrary to your desires.  Something that would devastate
someone bemoaning a breach of trust will only prove to be a minor
annoyance to you, with a course of action laid out.  Predictability
trumps trust and makes your life much, much easier, especially with
women.


Does your smell attract women, or not?
>> The Smell That Attracts Women


On with the fun…



-John Alanis

“The King of Let ‘em Come to You”


PS Got something for me personally?  Email it to: questions@johnalanis.com







Copyright, Art Of Steel, Inc.  MMXV

This email is protected by copyright, MMXV, Art Of Steel, Inc.
All right reserved. Reproduction in any form of any
portion of this email is strictly prohibited without the
express written consent of Art Of Steel, Inc. and John Alanis,
Inc.

John Alanis
Art Of Steel, Inc.  
4424 Gaines Ranch Loop #1035
Austin, TX 78735, USA
512 892 8839 Phone
response@womenapproachyou.com
http://www.JohnAlanis.com








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